Boys will be boys?

When I first became a mother, as expected, I was completely unprepared. The love I felt for her, the complete lack of sleep I got and how uneasy it would be to just pick up and go. Then she started having seizures. I was naive thinking they would stop with one medication or that she would hit all of her milestones like typical kids. But we got through it, have made adjustments and just keep on going. So by the time baby number 3 came around, I was pretty confident in my parenting skills. But then he turned 2. No one prepared me for a 2 year old boy. Defying everything I say? Check. Eating dog vomit? Check. Handing me dog poop? Check. Sucking on the toilet plunger? Check and barf. Who does that??? I feel like I need to follow him around the house with a bottle of Purell and a swab for his mouth. He looks at me and licks the cart handle at Target, laughing. He runs his sisters down and bites them in the back. He french kisses our bulldog puppy, who seems to enjoy it as much as he does. Potty training has been a wash but he does think it's "Awesome!" when he pees on the floor. He scatters cereal, coffee and plant dirt all over the house, despite our attempts at putting them out of his reach. Whenever he hears the bath water running, it's a full bore dive into the tub, clothes and all. He loves resetting my washing machine when it's on the rinse cycle and gets up at 5:30 am, every day, wanting his "bar" and "coffee", no matter what time he goes to bed. But then he wraps his arms around my neck and says, "Wuv you mommy" and I forget the 237 naughty things he did that day. And then I find my toothbrush... in the toilet.